Thursday, November 21 2019

male morning sickness, homemade popsicles, and bbq youtube videos

1013 words

⟵ home


Dear Journal,

Good morning, everyone! Hope you’re all finding a way to wake up this morning, with no help from the dark clouds and gloomy weather. I’m feeling pretty good this morning, and the coffee is hitting me just right. Yesterday morning, I had a bit of nausea, and just as I starting to fall down a Wikipedia rabbit hole researching how common sympathetic male morning sickness is, my wife pointed out that she things the aggressive blend of coffee we’ve been drinking is probably the cause. “Are you sure we’re not both just having morning sickness? Studies show that it typically begins in men just after the first trimester,” I added. “And come to think of it, my hormones do feel different.” Marissa rolled her eyes. “We’re already a couple of weeks into the second trimester, that wouldn’t be true anyway.” Alright - so psychosomatic morning sickness ruled out. And come to think of it, I did start to feel better once I stopped drinking coffee. Marissa had every right to tease me about thinking I had morning sickness, but she was gracious about it and let it go.

Yesterday morning I worked from home, hanging out with Rodney. He quietly watched TV as I worked at the table until Mom got home from class. We went out for lunch at Ian’s pizza, where I got to finally try their famous Thanksgiving slice - turkey, stuffing, cranberries, green beans, and there even may have been a little gravy on there. It wasn’t life changing, but I guess making something as ambitious as a Thanksgiving-themed pizza, they automatically get an ‘A’ if I can eat the whole slice without dry heaving. Good stuff, Ian’s. Good stuff.

After we got back, I worked through the afternoon on the couch while Marissa put Rodney to bed, then took a nap herself. I played some sketch comedy in the background at a low volume. After work, we all decided to take a trip to Hy-Vee. Marissa was deep in her nap, and resisted waking up for any reason, but after we got in the car and started inching through rush hour traffic to the grocery store, she said she was grateful I persisted. “Waking you up is no small task,” I monologued. “I’m like a vetted foreign ambassador in a hostile country. Every decision in waking you up must be carefully considered and planned, or it would have catastrophic effects on the geopolitical husband-wife relationship.”

Hy-Vee was busy. They were having a problem with their POS system, but we weren’t in a hurry. I was only planning on making pasta tonight, so as long as we got home with enough time to boil a pot of water, I was good. As we stood in line waiting for an available cashier to punch in our card number by hand, we chit chatted about the day. As we shopped, Rodney had brought a popsicle mold over to the cart and launched into an eloquent defense for why we should purchase it and make homemade popsicles. “I’m sold, dude. But we better pick up some juice with it or something.”

When we got home, I made pasta in meat sauce. Despite taking a while at Hy-Vee, I still had a little time in the kitchen to jazz things up. I snuck in some sliced garlic and a few anchovies into the red sauce and had some time to simmered it with a bay leaf. I use bay leaves when I can and when I’m supposed to, but I still haven’t exactly dialed into what they taste like. I’m not sure what they add to the cooking, but I appreciate that seeing a bay leave floating around in simmering liquid just puts me in the cooking mood.

After dinner, Rodney joined me in the kitchen to take a crack at making homemade popsicles. We put some apple juice on the stove and brought the heat up. I added a few scoops of sugar and a splash of vanilla syrup. Rodney quickly lost interest as soon as he realized I was just going to stand there and watch it simmer. As Marissa took him upstairs for a bath, I filled the popsicle mold with a turkey baster and stuck it in the back of our freezer.

After Rodney went to bed, Marissa sat in the kitchen trimming frames while I bumped some music and did kitchen chores. Afterwards, I made my way to the couch to watch some YouTube and do some more turkey research. I’m had already reviewed brining, stock, and gravy preparation, so now it was time to wade into the world of homemade BBQ instructional videos - which is not a world I like to be in. For most things you can make in the kitchen, there is probably a no frills, sensibly made and shot YouTube video explaining how to do it, but for whatever reason the second you start looking into BBQ the content quality takes a dive. There’s terrible music, cheesy camera wipes, rambling pseudo science, and just a touch of bragging to every explanation that teeters on mansplaining. Also, for some reason all of these “how to BBQ a X” videos turn into a giant plug for their favorite rub. I think I’m just going to wing it this year.

So that’s what I got today. My family is already up, I think Ziggy woke everyone up when I came out of the shower and she mistook me for a murderer. I generally appreciate her vigilance. So as Rodney is chatting my ear off as I’m trying to wrap up this entry, I wish you all a happy Thursday. Remember, male sympathetic morning sickness is not as common as you’d think. Buy a different blend of coffee before you jump to any conclusions. Hope you all have a great day today.